Baby, I was porn this way: Chelsea Poe on the life of a pornstar

From training her anal sphincters like an athlete before the Olympics to performing on stage with Cardi B, the life of a pornstar both on-screen and off-screen is anything but predictable. Chelsea Poe, trans porn performer and filmmaker, reveals the realities of being in the industry—the ups, the downs, and everything in between.

When the mansion of Pornhub CEO Feras Antoon burned down last year, in what he believes was arson perpetrated by ‘extreme religious groups’, discussions about the appropriateness of porn re-circulated. The site has undergone multiple lawsuits for profiting from rape, child pornography, trafficking, and revenge porn. Whether we like it or not, Pornhub has become the de facto face of porn, averaging 15 million users. Alongside Antoon’s billion-dollar mansion, the reputation of porn continues to burn. But it is easy to condemn something from the sidelines, which is why Chelsea Poe, as someone working as a porn performer and filmmaker since 2013, is breaking down the stigma associated with the notorious industry.

“I fainted in class,” Chelsea’s laugh echoes through the speakers of my MacBook. She recalls her teenage years, specifically the moment she fainted in her high school Sex Education class “freaked out by the anatomy” plastered on the walls. This would not be so odd (ok, maybe a little) if it were not the fact that Chelsea’s entire career is rooted in sex.

Despite her flashy and quite polarising career of eight years, Chelsea in her ordinary life seems far from the expectations of what a pornstar would be like off-screen. What are these expectations? Perhaps we envision them sashaying around their penthouse suites in latex corsets and ball gags. 

Instead, Chelsea sits in her brightly-lit bedroom in sunny California, wearing a pink Anti-Social Social Club jumper, hair tied up in a messy bun, and a jade necklace hanging from her neck. The Dyson hoover on the wall and the pride flag at the back of the frame complete this picture of normality, of humble beginnings. 

Chelsea remembers being introduced into the world of fetish at the age of 18 by none other than Lady Gaga. “I was a small kid from Michigan, so there wasn’t a lot of weirdness around and then there was this pop star who wore a strap-on everywhere, was a woman, and wore latex all the time,” says Chelsea about the Oscar-winning celebrity: “I thought, ‘wow I’m into this.’” 

From observing Gaga’s circle of performers, Chelsea eventually found herself watching the porn of the now-retired adult film star, Sasha Grey. It was from watching Sasha’s “intense gang bangs” that Chelsea became tantalised by porn, but Sasha’s “badass” activism was the cherry on top. 

“I saw someone being political and being outspoken, but also doing all these really extreme things that I wanted to do that I didn’t think I could do without giving up my voice,” says Chelsea. 

With this new ambition, Chelsea filmed and starred in her first film Fucking Mystic (2014) with her friends Ava LaPrima and Courtney Trouble. “It was a story about a girl who moved from the Midwest as I did—semi-biographical,” she laughs. Chelsea and her make-shift crew shot the film during her first year of living in the Bay Area, California in 2013. 

This first film is what made Chelsea learn about the hard work that goes into filming, especially “the multiple, multiple months of rewatching everything and editing”. Since then Chelsea has firmly established a foot in the industry with her later films Queer Porn Americana, Fucking against Fascism and XOXOX, cementing her credibility as a filmmaker. 

Now, Chelsea has become a veteran at the age of 30 best known for her roles in lesbian BDSM porn. Her site Chelsea Submits is the central hub of all her porn where she earns royalties on her projects with film company Trouble Films run by her friend, Courtney Trouble. Most porn performers have a website of their own where you can subscribe for around “10 to 25 bucks a month, and you can gain access to a full catalogue”. 

There is a lot more that goes into porn than one would expect; while there is no official “handbook” on how to be a pornstar, Chelsea runs through some of the preparation that needs to be done before filming.

“I’ll have a plug-in for about a month for like three or four hours a day,” Chelsea recalls, stroking her calico cat Lily-Mae. The butt plug helps the rectal muscles and usually ensures Chelsea is not in pain following filming. Alongside nails, brows, hair and getting waxed until she looks like a Sphynx cat, Chelsea must also do her own makeup and prepare multiple outfits. 

Food is an important factor before filming especially for scenes with anal so no, ahem, pathways are blocked. Chelsea personally sticks to “clear liquids” but dabbles in caffeine here and there in the form of a can of Redbull and “a bunch of Gatorade”. If this diet doesn’t work the charm then an enema 15 minutes before a shoot does the trick. 

The intensive routine is fitting for Chelsea, who has been recognised in public for her work. She describes feeling like a “mini indie-pop star” when fans approach her at festivals, tears streaming down their faces and praises on their tongues. But not everyone can put Chelsea’s face to a name and often Chelsea is stopped at grocery stores with people saying: “What are you from? Did we go to high school together? Are you on a TV show?”

Whilst Chelsea hasn’t been on TV in a traditional sense, she had the privilege of joining Cardi B on stage at the Adult Video News (AVN) Awards in January 2019. This flashy event is often known as the ‘Oscars of porn’ so it was no surprise the rapper who wanted a bucket and a mop for her WAP, Cardi B, headlined as the first female musician to ever perform at the award show. 

Chelsea, who attended the awards as part of the adult film industry, describes the moment she got on stage with Cardi B as “crazy”. There is excitement in her voice as she recalls this experience. “There was a mob of people all running up. And people were falling so there’s people literally underneath her feet. It was the weirdest experience,” she says, almost unable to still believe it happened to her. 

But it’s not all glamorous and having people cry to you about how you changed their life. While porn can feel enthralling to a consumer, for the performer it is about their ability to “perform on cue in front of a room of 10 people”. Chemistry is not the only thing heating the room up  – the burning lights are enough to turn the room into a sauna. 

“You might be expected to shoot at like 2AM because that’s the only time production can happen. It’s just all these things and conditions that go into making a shoot hard that aren’t necessarily even related to just the sex,” says Chelsea on the hurdles of filming.

She also mentions the longevity of being a porn performer, or rather the lack of it, as “most people don’t last two years in the industry”. If you manage to make a career lasting over three or four years you are considered a “veteran”. But why are careers so short?

“Mentally and physically, you’re going to go through some shit and you’re going to have to be in a mental place that, not only do you feel like you’re still getting something from porn, but you also have to feel like you’re still able to accomplish things and move forward. Like any entertainment career, there are many ups and downs. I had moments where I just said, ‘ok I’m quitting porn’ but obviously I didn’t,” answers Chelsea.

Despite the obstacles, Chelsea takes pride in her work as someone of Dutch heritage.  “I think for me as well being Dutch it means a lot to me to continue the tradition. Being a visible person who is a porn performer and is Dutch, I feel very proud to be a part of that,” says Chelsea with pride. Sex work has been intertwined in Dutch culture for hundreds of years, with De Wallen in Amsterdam being the largest red-district area and a hotspot for international sex tourism in the Netherlands. 

Supporting from the sidelines are Chelsea’s family who cheered for the performer following her win as ‘Cam Star of the Year’ at the Ynot Cam Awards 2021, an award show celebrating adult webcams and clips. In a moment of candour, Chelsea says: “honestly, the outpouring of support from my family and friends is something I never expected and was even more meaningful than winning the award. 

“I think part of it is being from a small town where people don’t move to California and win awards and stuff. Hearing you made your grandma proud is always special and made me tear up for sure,” she says. 

She’s not quitting porn anytime soon. On finding a sense of self in the medium, she says: “I don’t think there are many other mediums that I, as a twenty-something trans woman, would have travelled the world with.”

Enjoyed this article? Read more here: The invisibility of trans men with ovarian cancer