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Mystified by monogamy? Lost in the lingerie aisle? Confused by kinks? Our resident agony aunt Prudence offers answers to PRUDE readers’ problems…
Q. How do I not get grossed out by people in general? I’m icking all over the place and it’s thrown a spanner in the works for my sex life – the idea that people may not shower at least once a day, or cut their toenails regularly, the thought that they sneeze and wipe it with their hands or that they might not often wash behind their ears makes me shudder so much that I don’t even try. How do I be less judgmental and clean-freakish?
A. When ‘the ick’ is out of the box it’s difficult to squash it back in. Some people are gross, there’s no denying it, and hygiene is important. But there is a base layer of human grot that just comes with the homo sapiens parcel.
We are not always pine fresh, and that is okay. To start with, maybe shower sex is a shout? When you bring someone home – or go back to theirs – whip the soap out. That way you know they’re clean as you do the deed. Cosmo have a specially tailored list of shower positions if you’re interested. Or have a bath, with candles and stuff.
Later you can progress to not always going straight for the shower, but as a stepping stone it could work – it would help you put yourself at ease without having to explain to whoever you’re with that you’re worried they are filthy (actually, they’d probably think it was sexy if you told them that in this situation).
Also, there’s bound to be people who find your obsession with cleanliness a right turn-on. If latex fetishes exist, so do Lenor kinks. Just think how ecstatic the people in shampoo adverts look. There’s a whole shiny squeaky sub-culture to explore.
If you’ve got a problem to do with sex, relationships or anything Prude-ish, send in your question to Prudence at: email@example.com